I’m one of many Girl Survivors- I was raped in January this year by a man who bullied his way into my home. I started writing within the few weeks afterwards-  I’ve been appalled at the blatant rape culture I have faced when reporting this, or equally when not speaking about it. As well as trying to make sense of The unspoken and blatantly spoken control that led up to these crimes. I will try to post some of the pieces I wrote here- I will go back and add earlier writings- I’ve started with this one, ‘Wall of Silence” which is where I was at when I started this site.  In meeting and speaking with other survivors, I realise I am not alone in what I’ve experienced. This shocking crime and variations on it, are a form of social control that is not really spoken about in real terms in mainstream media- where television and media are awash with male versions and fantasies of what rape is- This is played out by actresses who are usually directed by men who have not been through this, or anything like this- and judge, jury, police and public opinion is based more on that, than any real understanding. When faced with the real thing, most do not even recognise it. Our truth is dismissed in favour of men’s experience, which we are supposed to respect and understand at the expense of our own. I understand there are also male survivors of rape and sexual assault. 98% of rape victims are female. The statistics from Rainn.org are that 97% of rapists never spend a day in jail. Those who criticise victims and survivors for not coming forward to “law enforcement” are completely in the dark about what that process is really like for survivors.

These are my writings of how I got through so far. I hope by sharing, it might help someone else, or just inform people, who might otherwise be in the dark- or not think about this stuff much. If you are going through similar – sending you big love and respect- Whoever you are thank you for coming by and reading- and or reaching out. It can be amazing to speak with other survivors-  through this I have made new friends of a calibre that I would have never have imagined- who are more powerful than any bully. I’d welcome if you want to get in touch/ reach out in any way. Together we are stronger and less vulnerable.

© GS

Drawing with thanks to Siobhan Sands #siobhansands

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